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Topics - Mike Torello

Pages: [1] 2 3
1
Survival Guides / Game Help / Cathedral dungeon - 3 floor
« on: January 28, 2017, 13:15 »
If this video help someone just a little bit, me happy.
learning making movies so if i fuck smth let me know  :-*

Spoiler
     

2
Sell / WTS Mariposa bomb
« on: January 14, 2017, 23:40 »
start 490k

Cheers

3
Gangs / looking for gang-closed
« on: December 16, 2016, 22:02 »
Looking for gang.Got my gear and shit.Anti drama person, just here to shoot ppl.
Got blind burster, sniper, bazooka, all implanted.
Cheers





4
Roleplay / Just stories
« on: August 11, 2016, 18:42 »
Hello!Someone loves movies, someone loves fishing, someone loves cooking and I love stories so I put them here so maybe one day steal some smile but primarily I want that one day when I'm old and lame, think back to this shit I wrote in moments of inspiration.I apologize to my English which is bad and all the stories so far are written on mobiles without google translators.A by God and translator is for dick sometimes (i use it now  ;D).I'm working on a story, so that they are not scattered around, i will throw them here.

Cheers

Rude awakening
Spoiler
I woke up with terrible pain in head and i feel like humer hit me and broke all my bones.Yesterday fights was tough.Only Jimmy down there hold like lion so i manage to crowl to the phone and dial number of Joana, sexi, blond hooker from Den.
-hello, who is it?
- is me, Jim.Come to my place fast and bring some beers cuz i am all broken and can't drive.Hurry please.
She smile like only hooker can smile.
- but Jim, baby, i can't do that, sorry.
- wtf u talking about?
My Jimmy down there start tweechin.
- yesterday i saw all over on news how NCR said that FL are criminals and who cooperate with them will be punished.
- da fak, what u mumbling about, come here and forget about them, i am horny as hell!
- can't Jim, sorry, i was already join them, ncr army and they allways pay me, they are not like u.
I think i heard my jimmy crying.
- i got fucking money, come, jesus!Dont worry about NCR, damit!
-sorry, baby, i wont come, realy sorry..
I slam phone and go straight to a bar in Hub.Barney, bold, skinny fucker was owner of this stinky joint.
- hello Bar, hit me usual and make it tripple.
- uhh, Jim, sorry but there is one problem.
- i pay u Bar, dont worry, gimme drink and...
- Jim, yesterday was here NCR soldiers.
Did i am dead already or what da fuck is happenin with me.
- they said u are all going to die from them cuz u are criminals and they also ask me to join them.
- sweet jesus Barney, what will u do in combat, throw beer's at us?
-they said that i be well in NCR army so tomorow i close here joint and open in NCR bazar.
- sure, sure, go poison them also like u did to us for ten years, skinny fuck and i dont pay u a single caps.
I grab one bottle of booze and go on street.I light cig and start think my next move.   


- Pussy wait for no one
Spoiler
I was just about to go out when phone ring.Damit, that is for sure Alexis, redhead chick whit tits that u wish having lunch on them.Last fuck i didn't pay her and just sneak out tru bathroom window on street.I set up my sweet voice and start singing.
- Alexis, darling, i am so glad to hear u.U couth me just in moment when i prepare to go straight to u, honey.I know u probably angry on me but really no reason to be cuz...
-Jim...Jim...close your sinner mouth, please..i am sick enough without y story's...
That was Serpico, my team8.Big and ugly motherfucker who wielding rocket launchers like they was from papers.By ugly i mean so ugly that he could easy stand in corn field and scare all animals and creatures in radius of mile.
- Oooo, hansome Serpico!What u need, metal mask?And wtf is with y voice, u start to eat rockets?
- I was...on poker...last night with Pocoyo and i invite some women's to come over...
- Women's?Women's??I can imagine how they look like ahaha..They probably finish shift in graveyard when u call and decide to visit u.
- Jim...Close y butthole, i am sick and...
I heard him coughin and puking in same time.
- Jesus, Serpico, u sound like u dyin, mate.
- Maybe i die...But first..
I heard again how his lumbs jumps.Scary shit.
- Listen me carefuly...Dildo and Fork bustin in...Me and Pocoyo was with those...Birds...In bed...
When i imagine that picture i feel how i gonna puke."Birds" and those two clowns in bed, brrrr.Fork and Dildo was two brothers with together's IQ of half dead chicken, but for that reason they was very dangerous.They was mercenery's and willing to do whatever for money.
- They ambush us and probably those birds...Was working with them...
- hmm.And?
- They said how we must pay them 8kk caps or...they will chope...limb by limb if we dont pay...
- Christ!And then?
- They beat us like it was Chinese new year...Whit crowbars, chair's, baseball bats..
- Shiit.Where is Poco?
- He is in bed, barely breathing...
- Ok.Do u know who contracted u two lovebierds?
- Derrek...Jim...Please do what u have to do...we have 5 days to gather money...i have 2kk only and Poco probably have jack shit...u know that fucker...always kunta kinte..
Dammn.Derrek.Rich motherfucker from Vault city, city of rich people and good quality drugs and booze.Top guarded city and my face is unwanted there.
- Ok, amigo.I settle all.Watch out for yself and that fucker Poco.
- Jim...
- Yes?
- Thank u.
- of "thank u" is even a horse die.
- Fuck u, Jim...
- I love u to haha.
So i guess my weekend whit Ginger fall in toilet.Fucking shit, when i be able to stop killing and just bang pussy's, dammit...

- Freaky Friday
Spoiler
I bump in damn hanger and tore up my brand new jacket.A fucking ciggaret fall of in that moment and i accidently step on her and crush.Curse aloud cuz that was my last one and open door headed out.My car was filty as hell outside, drunks was probably replace my car for toilet.Well, fuck it, what can i do now.I open car door and smell of hundreds death rats overcome me so hard that my nose hurt.Oo sweet jesus come down and see this-i think to my self and open all doors so draft little easy that horror smell.I was battered past days whit crew and i remember in hase that we drive all araund with some chics also, stoned.One flash come to me how Pocoyo was on car roof, naked and shooting from M60.Damn.I need cigs badly but if i leave car doors open those drunks and bums probably stole him.I can feel their eyes on me.Then i see Crazy Mick.He was digging on trash can and mumble something.
- Mick!Hey, Mick!.
Nothing.His pants was semi green brown from shit, piss and God know what else and his shirt was same.Hair was long like bierd and he look like Jesus who save world 10 time in a row.
- Mick u fuck! Miiick!
Nothing again.Probably he saw something interesting in trash or voices in head was to laud.
I pull lighter and smack him directly in head.Lighter stuck in those filty hair and lost forever.Mick turn head slowly and look me with eyes of madman.I knew he can attack if snap but if u give him some booze he do anything.
- h-hello Jim.
- hi Mick.How things?
-never better.I found job yesterday.
- yea? What kind of job?
- i deliver packages for Mr.Hatchet
In other word that was drugs.I give him month or two llife but who knows, those kinda ppl sometime suprises u how they manage to escape death.
- good for u.Listen, can u do something for me? I pay u in some booze.Two bottles of finest Scotch.
He smile with laugh u never forget reveal three tooth in shape of 15 years dog.
- who i have to kill, hihihi.
- just be here and watch my car for 20 minuts.Can u do that?
- can fish swim?Can bird fly, hihihi.Can hooker...
- ok, ok, spare me yours twisted jokes.Here is one bottle and second u get when i come back.Dont fuck this up, u hear me?This is no ordinary car, Mick, this is Rocco Sifredi amongs cars.If u need sit somwhere then sit better in trash can than in this baby, u hear me?Now is little filty but when is clean, pussy's w8 in lines to drive in this baby.
- i can imagine hihihi.
I start walking to a store and step precisely in shit on street.Fucking day!Can day start worse then already.So i buy ciggs and pull one out to smoke.Ahhh, fuck all what happen before, from this moment i start enjoy in this friday.Pussy's, here i come!Da faq!I throw lighter on that wreck Mick!Sweet jesus!I walk to my car cursing all the way.Scene i look was bad.Car was riddled with bullets.I pull out gun but noone was there.Even Mick.I enter car and notice some paper.On paper was written: go screw y car now, punk and if i ever catch u near my house, i cut u with rusty spoon and l let u die! Betty husband.
Flashes of that blond and sexi Betty flow in my head.Ohhh how she likes to ride my bike.I crushed paper and throw tru window, light cigg and start car.
Freaky friday started, young and in full shine.I laugh atloud and fart.In radio was playin Rolling Stones:paint in black.
Feel so stronk, motherfuckers out there!

- Never is too late
Spoiler
It was beautiful morning.One of those that u wish last as long as possible.I had some money in my pocket, my car was back from reparing and i was full of life.Even my two crazy birds was banging in cage in that beautiful morning.I couldn't shake smile from my face when i load my needler and rifle.Today i decide to pay all my debts so i go first to Iguana Bob.But past days i was going tru real shit.It was not all milk and honey.Dammn.That incident with gun seller Marv was scary.We crack locks in Marv storage one night and start taking guns and ammo when Marv bust in with three man.They was armed.
- ho ho ho, who we have here boys! Isn't that horny Jim and his dirty bunch, he, he, he.Hands up, maggots, where i can see them and go outside to that wall.Fast, scumbags! Move, MOVE!
Situation was ugly.We stand against the wall, line up.
- u know the law, Jim.Thiefs can be shoot on the spot, he, he, he, who will take first shoot, boys?U Jim?Serpico?Pocoyo?C'mon guys dont disappoint me here..I was always think that u dont afraid death, that u are somekind immortal faggs...
Serpico laugh.
- can u call y wife, Marv, to come so she can blow me for the last time?From all things, that i miss moust ya know..Her eyes when she blow mmmm...
223 pistol is known like powerfull gun and his penetration can put horse on his knee but Serpico, my good, big and ugly Serpico was stil on feet when bullet from Marv gun smack in chest.Serpico set some painfull smile and just stand while red stain start spreading on chest.
- ain't u funny ugly motherfucker..Tell me more of your story's, Serpico..I enjoy very much haha..
Serpico spit big pile of blood.He was stil standing while almoust whole front of shirt was bloody.
- u know, Marv, it is sad on one point all of this.
- what is sad? That u gonna die and throwing to pigs?
Then Pocoyo spoke:
- forget all this shit Marv.Dont be stupid.People will find out who kill us and then rest of crew will lookin for u and u know what will happen when they find u.Even big fish wouldn't protect u and aproove all this shit u gonna do here..
- shut the fuck up, worm! When i finish whit u fuckers i throw u to pigs and noone ever will find yours remains.Finally i welcomed this moment ha, ha, ha.
Serpico smile.
- sad is that u gonna die, right here, right now and i continue to bang y wife..
Second bullet smack his shoulder making Serpico arm swing back and nail him to wall behind him.
Marv turn head to his boys:
- u see, fellows, how...
Red beam chop Marv head from body, hit ground and roll few  metar away.Next laser beam hit guy with avenger in chest and upper part of body just slide down while rest of body stand there for few secunds and just fall down.Third beam strike dude with lsw straight in head and pieces of brain and skin just spray us.Four guy stoned at that time and then he start run.We watch him how he run cris cros and then while we all think that he will save his ass, hummer drove in big speed and smack him.He was probably dead on spot but if not, he die in moment when his body crash in wall making loud and blunt sound.Hummer drove to us and Yolandi open door.
- howdy, fuckers haha.I am sorry if i late little but was traffic jam kinda so...
Yolandi was silent crittical motherfucker who talk little but shoot alot.He was kinda loner past year but show up when is needed like ghoust.
And that's how the story goes, my comrades.Again my jimmy pass untouched and again i didn't die.But for how long lady Luck protect me and cuddle my balls?Who fucking care...All that make me feel hungry.

And horny.

-Bad moon rising
Spoiler
I was slurpin hot coffe and watch tru dirty window of dirty bar in Hub.Ppl call Hub "swamp" for obvius reason.Old linpy waiter was sittin in scratchy chair and stare in old tv some football game, long forgotten.Argentina vs Yugoslavia 1990 year, world cup.O, that was a football.Why i didn't train that shit, i bet i be today far away from this shit hole and drink exlusiv alchohol in fine places.Why?Close i get to sport was that time when we beat striker from local team cuz he own some money to some boss.
- paps, u got some Brandy?
Paps turn head so slowly like he inveted the time and i swear for a moment he look like goddamn 3-pio from starwars.
- yes, i bring u.
What life that old timer have, i think to my self.How much shit he swallow when he looks like tier from 90'th car?How he wrestle with life when he end up in this Godsayfuck joint?What wait me?Woul'd i look like floor spagheti like him, without any sparkle in my eyes?Before how long he give up from life or better question is: before how long life smack him with foot in ass and suck all juicy's from his body?
I knew that somwhere wait me some sweetie and that  we will live in house, in fine neiberghood, peacefull life.And Santa Claus will bring me bag full of money, yea right.
I smack drink and go out on empty street.Few wankers was hanging in main street, half wasted so i avoid them and go shortcut to my car.I sat down inside and light cig.Didn't want to start car cuz i was afraid if i can move that old horse at all.And where, the fuck, i go anyway? Boys was probably sleepin, wasted from last night and for chics was to early.I wish that Jim is araund.He was funny company to drink with.He dissopier month ago, w/o single word and no trace of him.His brother Vargas was shoot from back in his house day after.Nobady know nothing about that incident and rumors goes that Jim was messin with some big fishes from north.Who the fuck care, ppl die here like fly's in novembar.But i care.I was tired of that life.I was tired of wrestlin with life every fucking day.Tired of shit in every corner, tired of seein good peoples goin down.Tired of stupid govermant who squeeze ppl, stupid laws, fake smilin ppl, ugly womens, bad fucking music, rich boys who dont know where is place of brain in head, my fucking old car, that i cant go 350 fucking km to stick ass into sea once on year, tired of overcrowd goddamn buses, smelly ppl, overprized stuff in stores, bad weed, preachin on tv of folks who have dick instead of spine, tired of stupid motherfuckers who live in past and drag all country to that shit, tired cuz i cant buy new drumms, tired of future and shit isn't come yet.
I turn key and old horse jump up and down while black smoke fullfiled whole street.Sun was starting to go for deserved rest and i decide to cruse strets, waiting for my pal Moon to light me road.

5
Sell / WTS enviromental implant - SOLD
« on: June 04, 2016, 12:08 »
WTS for 200k or trade for psycho/jet.
Cheers

6
Sell / WTA speed implant
« on: May 31, 2016, 23:38 »
Speed implant
start 1,2kk
min bid 50k
over 24 hour after last bid


Cheers

7
Buy / WTB lvl book from 26-45 lvl
« on: March 17, 2016, 10:46 »
As title say.
Here or pm, whatever, just please say your prize for book.

Cheers

8
Sell / WTS Lvl 99 Book, Hubo robes, gauss rifle recepie etc...
« on: February 13, 2016, 19:14 »
WTS 30 hubo robes 110k
gauss rifle recepie 50k
g11 recipe 40k
g11e recipe 40k
99 lvl book 400k
50 metal armors mk2 45k

I forgot to add recipe so i fuck few guys cuz they tought i sell guns  ;D
Guys sorry and let force be with u  :)
Cheers

9
Hyde Park / Fuck u, working class peoples!
« on: November 25, 2015, 08:06 »
So one motherfucker from america come here in Croatia to some talking about reffugee crisys and police is on street, roads are blocked and my sorry ass need to swim a cross river to get on job or hichjack police car to manage pass blocade.
So that kukuruza bag dont wanna fly in chooper or Croatia dont have one or guverment enjoy to fuck in head those few who actualy have jobs and work for all motherfuckers who have suspicious retirements, gipsy's, social cases with cca 21 kids etc.
To american kukuruza fucker; GET IN DA CHOOPER!!!!

What is y thinking about that?


10
Suggestions / Science trollin in Ares or other dungeons
« on: October 24, 2015, 10:33 »
As title say, i suggest disabling bouth science comand in dungeons and disabling completly science while combat mode is on.People do some dungeon but one bluesuit/speed/autistic/mad guy can easy science corpse of player.Supporting such activity will lead only to worse mental case of such player and ruin fun for others.




11
Sell / wts 30 hubo robes and 1200 metal parts
« on: October 16, 2015, 08:36 »
I sell robes as whole package same as metal parts.
Offer here please.

12
Buy / WTB defense implant
« on: September 12, 2015, 17:49 »
Wtb defense implant

13
Buy / WTB psycho
« on: September 05, 2015, 17:44 »
Wtb 100 psycho
my offer is 60k

Cheers


14
Sell / WTS enchantment implant
« on: August 24, 2015, 12:46 »
WTS enchantment implant
700k





15
Bugs / Hate that robo and he hate me
« on: August 09, 2015, 14:09 »
Please if some dev can help me? My robo cleaning was going crazy so i shoot him and unfortunatly he die next to door of my car.I can't see him but i can't also take my car.My character just stand and can't aproach car.

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